Mari Daftar Kelab Isteri Taat

Kecoh benar isu Kelan Isteri Taat atau Obedient Wife Club. Yang pelik, dalam kecoh-kecoh suami mithali dirumah tak tahu cerita. Bisalah, suami saya kalau dia nak ambil tahu, dia akan kaji cukup-cukup. Kalau tak mahu. memang langsung tak tahu.

Apapun, saya tidak akan berkongsi pendapat saya disini. Saya khuatir jika saya tidak mempunyai kemahiran menerangkan dan bercakap dengan baik sehingga pendapat saya nanti boleh disalah ertikan. Lagipun itukan tips berblog.

Satu sahaja pendapat saya, yang juga saya kongsikan dengan abang ipar saya seorang wartawan (yang kata dirinya kacak) itu. Mungkin benar dalam kenyataan Dr. Rohaya Mohamad ada menyebut mengenai layanan yang lebih baik dari ‘pelacur kelas pertama’ tetapi bukanlah beliau bermaksud untuk menyamakan seorang Isteri dengan seorang pelacur.

owc

Biasanya seorang isteri, terutamanya yang sudah beranak-pinak, lupa menjaga diri sendiri. Berhias untuk suami. Bukankah berhias untuk suami itu diajar dalam Islam? (mengingatkan diri sendiri juga kerana sering melebihkan anak-anak dan hal diri sendiri daripada suami😦 )

Apapun, satu pengajaran yang kita boleh dapat dalam isu ini adalah berhati-hati ketika bercakap. Mudah sahaja untuk orang menyalahertikan maksud percakapan kita.🙂

Terima kasih kepada Cik Puan Najlah Ishak kerana berkongsi respon Dr. Harlina Siraj mengenai isu ini. Maafkan juga kerana tidak menterjemah ke dalam bahasa Melayu kerana khuatir saya salah terjemah hingga saya pula terkeluar dari konteks. :))

My response to the Obedient Wives Club (OWC)

I was in Sitiawan when I first heard about the report on the launching of the Obedient Wives Club by Global Ikhwan last week.The first question that hit my mind then was, what neccesitates the setting up of such a club in this country? What are the main objectives and what does such club aspire to achieve? When the launching was highlighted by all the media in the country and of course, by some international news agencies as well – the key point quoted from the Deputy President of the club, Dr Rohaya Mohamad (who was my senior in Seri Puteri as well as in UKM more than 20 years ago) was somewhat shocking.

I would like to think that Dr Rohaya’s statement was taken out of contact, when she was quoted to say that wives must be extremely good and skillful in bed, better than the first-class prostitutes or sex workers, to keep marriages intact and reduce the divorce rate in the country. I immediately realized, this comparison was going to be explosive, sensational and would stir up a lot of concerns from members of the public. I decided to give the club some time – at least they should almost immediately, come out with an official statement to clarify and correct the misperception that had somewhat tarnished the reputation and good image of wives in general. Although subsequent follow-up by a news agency indicated that  some members of the club agreed that the statement was taken out of context, there was no official statement of clarification issued by the club, at least by Dr Rohaya herself as the representative. Not that I know of, untll the time this note is completed.

So, what now? I am all out for any collective effort that promotes and protects the sanctity of marriages in our society. However, I have problems with proposed solutions that are simplistic and somewhat superficial, unbalanced and non-holistic. And as far as I am concerned, the suggestions by OWC are included into that category. I am sure we can do better than just looking at women as sexual objects, and men as individuals govern solely by their raging testorones. How can we garner and enrich the sense of respect, mutual interdependence and genuine care that are paramount for our well-being, if we still regard each other by levels of superiority and inferiority, obedience and disobedience based on sexual submission?

In the eyes of Allah, we all stand tall and proud as `ahsani taqwim’ – the best creatures ever created.

But,in the eyes of men, where do women stand?

Allow me to suggest an answer to that question. In the eyes of men, women would be seen as how they ( women) see themselves. If we engage ourselves into thinking that a woman’s worth is mainly focussed at her sexual prowessness, how else more do we want men to see us?

After all, sexuality is a very complex yet essential part of our life. It is influenced by so many factors – either externally as well as internally. A woman will face a decline in her libido or sexual desire during pregnancy, breastfeeding, depression and climacteric. So does a man, who has his own ups and downs throughout his life. And I always believe, sexual intercourse is actually the peak form of communication between husband and wife. If the couple hardly communicate during the day ( either verbally or non-verbally), they would not be able to fulfill their physical, cognitive, emotional and spiritual needs during the sexual intecourse that night. If couple could communicate openly to each other especially on sexual matters, I do not think we need a club like OWC.

Wallahu a’lam.

I really would like to see my dear Dr Rohaya Mohamad aka K.Aya one day, InsyaAllah. And we’ll talk, like we used to – as sisters. And as always, we will agree to disagree………..

Dr Harlina Halizah Siraj

4 thoughts on “Mari Daftar Kelab Isteri Taat

  1. sy menyokong obw krn dlm keadaan skrg yg dunia dikelilingi oleh wanita2 yg semakin ‘telanjang & murah (bukn semua)’,amat mudah seseorg lelaki terpengaruh jika diberi peluang.wanita juga yg semakin terdesak nafsu mereka tidk memperdulikan siapa lelaki itu,adakah dia suami org atau siapa pun janji dpt melempiaskn nafsunya.sy menyifatkn lelaki spt sy yg sukakn kecantikan ,kelembutan ,kehangatan dari seorg wanita.jadi andai sy tak memperolehinya dari isteri sy yg sah maka mungkin sy akan berubah angin kpd yg lain .nak berkawin lain bimbang akan mendpt tentangn dari isteri & akan menyebbkn penceraian jd jln mudah ikut jln belakang..namun buat masa skrg,isteri sy adalah yg terbaik walaupun dia penentang owc.cuma pesanan sy buat para isteri,layani suami sebagaimana kita mula2 bercinta..sirami suami dgn baja2 kasih sampai ke akhir hayat…pasti suami akan ttp bersamamu seorg sj.mengenai owc tiada salah jika suami mampu utk berkawin lebih dgn kerelaan para isteri..

    • Terima kasih atas komen. Pada saya, jika kita benar-benar mengikut sunnah nabi dalam perkahwinan, dan juga berpegang teguh kepada Al-Quran, apa pun dugaan mendatang kita akan bisa tempuhi bersama pasangan kita.

      Islam mengajar cara suami mendatangi isteri, cara menangani cemburu isteri, penat lelah, sikap baran dan 1001 macam karenah isteri. Isteri juga harus memahami hati suami.

      Suami isteri yang bertaqwa kepada Allah sudah pasti akan tahu peranan masing-masing dalam keluarga dan rumahtangga semua ini.

      Saya sarankan para suami terutamanya membaca buku Bilik-bilik CInta Muhammad untuk belajar bagaimana Nabi Muhammad saw melayani isterinya-isterinya, ada isteri nabi yang kuat membantah, ada juga yang kuat cemburu, ada yang pernah ditalak dan bermacam-macam lagi. belajarlah semua itu.

      Isteri juga perlu baca buku ini supaya memahami setiap tindakan sang lelaki.

      Belajarlah.

  2. Tak adillah jika ada kelab isteri taat suami,sepatutnya mesti juga ada kelab suami taat dan patuh kepada isteri,terutamanya jika ada suami yang panas baran,zalim,pemabuk,tikam nombor ekor dan yang tidak layak digelar suami.saya setuju jika suami macam ini diturunkan tarafnya duduk dibawah telapak kaki isterinya.Biar dia belajar jadi seorang suami yang hina dan tahu memuliakan dan megagogkan isterinya.

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